A sin for me~

I have a fear and phobia in my life.
I've tried many ways to overcome it but come to no avail.My love ones around me are always by my side to 'lend a hand' .They know what have I gone through.
The phobia is just like a scar for me and it's forever!

I've done it and it's a sin for me.Only me myself have to be tough to handle all these.
However,sometimes things refresh back all my sin and it's hurtful enough to think of it.

I've controlled myself not to think of the past but things can't be controlled sometimes!
Many things...many ways...I've done it but nothing can make it 'disappear' from my life.
I know it's fated for me to be guilty for the rest of my life.

And again,history repeats.
But from someone else!